“An old-timer schooled me. He said, ‘Don’t burn bridges my friend.’ Imagine the G-Dub close and your ass have to swim.”
I can’t do it. I can’t be part of a team or group in which I’m not the leader. I’m not a “role player” or someone who can just fit in. But I’m also definitely not one to seek attention. I don’t like being the center of attention. I hate being congratulated, people saying that they’re proud of me or accepting awards. I don’t even want to be at my own graduation. My need to be the one who makes all the decisions is different from the tendencies of an attention-seeker. I need to be in control, not the spotlight. And the thing I appreciate is that everyone recognizes that I can dominate and control at will. Why or how can she then choose him? I’m too brash and aggressive? He’s a suck-up? Fuck.
Everyone fucking knows that I did the best in that class. I don’t let things go, so what? I will make sure he knows that he is my inferior in every way possible, and I will do it with silent and relentless success, Tim Duncan style.
Don’t smile without malice.
I don’t really enjoy doing things or being with people unless I’m competing to be better or to win.
I don’t really enjoy myself unless I’m in the mindset of trying to crush someone.
“Here’s a jewel: love your enemies, and hate your friends. Your enemies remain the same; friends always change.”
Just listened to a song that reminds me of last Summer and Sydney. Made me happy, sad and super-nostalgic at the same time.
